The Host (ESFJ + ESE)

Overview (Extroverted Feeling + Sensing)

The Host shows up as an emotionally engaging, warm, and energetic person, a stereotypical “extrovert“, who is eager to accommodate and enliven other people in their presence, without missing sight on people’s physical state and wellbeing. They are concerned with other people having a visibly good time and making sure they are physically and emotionally comfortable, themselves included. 

For that reason, most Hosts end up organizing big parties and events, being literal TV hosts, or organize their children’s lives as a very engaged, on-the-go parent. They are often tirelessly on the move, helping and supporting others as much as possible. Some Hosts gravitate towards other forms of entertainment, sports, health/wellness, or technical professions. 

Either way, typically with a big smile on their face and laughter, they usually warmly welcome others and try to fit into or direct their social environment, with both a caring but firm approach.

to host– to receive or entertain guests… to host a dinner. to serve as a host. to host friends.

Host : a person who receives or entertains other people as guests. “they were always gracious hosts at the numerous dinner parties they held for friends“

Oxford Languages

Purpose Role: The Host is in their natural element when they gather, organize, and host situations related to people, ensuring the livelihood, enjoyment, and (physical) well-being of everyone included, by employing emotional vibrancy and a caring touch.

Main Functions (Fe & Si)

Extroverted Feeling (Fe)

The Host usually runs on a higher emotional charge with a wide smile on their face, especially when they are around other people. The emotional atmosphere has a strong impression on them and they like to impress it back. The Host enjoys gaiety and loud laughter, and can be quite apt at eliciting that from other people during joyful celebrations and similar, and never gets bothered or tired of doing so. As a result, other people often find themselves emotionally invigorated in their presence.

The Host can be focused on setting the right emotional atmosphere based on the situation at hand, even if it is serious and focused, or even somber, though that is not their overall preference, being primarily focused on levity and lighthearted emotions. They have the natural tendency to organize other people around them, based on a common activity in the social realm.

They will make sure that most people in the interaction are part of the shared atmosphere – if they refuse, the Host and/or the resisting person won’t be at ease. The Host may even directly accuse the other person of “ruining the fun“ or acting inappropriately based on the current situation.

The Host is usually focused on “our emotions”, the shared emotional standards and modes of social behavior, and therefore tends to find internal preferences, likes and dislikes, and personal moral standards as rather inconsequential if they do not have a clear impact on someone’s mood or are not shared by everyone (or at least most). People’s moods and shared behavior have a higher priority over the identity or preferences of individuals. That also means that an individual “ruining the mood” or a common cause with their moody behavior, can become an issue for the Host. The Host is inclined to actively try to “cheer up“ the other person or make them feel what they are “supposed to“, based on the situation at hand. 

Introverted Sensing (Si)

The Host is typically concerned with making sure that everyone is at ease and has all the amenities that they might need to feel comfortable in the situation, either physically or mentally. Some Hosts will focus a lot on providing good food and other pleasantries like tea, others focus less on tangible objects and more on the person being able to mentally relax into the situation and feel free to open up or not stress themselves out over certain issues. 

Often times, the Host is inclined to talk freely about their own personal physical state and level of wellbeing, illustrating how certain substances/ foods, medications, or events have impacted their internal physical state, thereby giving the other person the opportunity to do the same. Many Hosts enjoy talking at some length about how to optimize one’s physical health and mental well-being, though that doesn’t mean that all Hosts are healthy, many can be the opposite, it depends on their mental health.

Alongside the Caregiver and at times the Aesthete, the Host is one of the types that has the most psycho-somatic symptoms when they are under emotional stress. It is not uncommon for mentally unhealthy Hosts to be both perpetually “sick“ or unwell but also oddly well and energetic at the same time. 

The Host can also have the tendency to romanticize past events a lot and keep little tokens of their favorite memories stacked up in their homes, similar to the Caregiver.

Further External Behavior

Strong (Unvalued) Extroverted Sensing (Se)

Despite their focus on well-being and rest, the Host is often known to be on the move, rarely stopping until they have done everything they want to do that day. Some Hosts who are more in touch with the sensorial world are usually very physically active and may occasionally push themselves to the limit. 

If the Host finds it helps with a better emotional state or other issues that are important to them, they can also be quite pushy and hard to resist. If less healthy, they can be inclined to prod others profusely until the other person does what the Host thinks is best for the person. 

Despite these behaviors in themselves, they tend to find an excessive overemphasis on physicality, movement, force, appearances and the like rather uninteresting, and prefer others around them to not focus on these matters too much. 

Some Hosts will occasionally “crash“ after being on high-speed for too long, and then need to rest by themselves, much to the surprise of everyone involved.

(Unvalued) Extroverted Thinking (Te)

The Host can have moments of being concerned with external data, being on top of the latest information, and structuring situations logically. Many Hosts get into (temporary) professions that deal with paperwork and other bureaucratic matters, or alternatively help others with that in their free time. Though if the Host does this for too long or much, they will get stressed and grumpy.

Aim at Extroverted Intuition (Ne)

The Host enjoys engaging with novel concepts and silly and childlike jokes, especially if they are either related to daily life or scientific understanding. They may have moments of strongly engaging and generating new ideas or behaviors in this area for bouts of time. 

Unvalued Internal Functions

Weak Introverted Intuition (Ni)

Typically the Host feels mentally unprepared when it comes to facing the (future) developments of events, especially when they relate to technological innovation or theoretical insights, but it can occur as a general issue in their life. 

(Unhealthy) Hosts can suffer from a lot of stress in this area, trying to anticipate what will happen or how events are interconnected, but in doing so they experience an odd sort of “blank mind“, which drives them to assume the worst possible scenarios or leads to an emotional outburst. 

At best, they just generally avoid dealing with this area and stay active. They find it difficult to delve deeply into their psyche and understand the hidden meanings within themselves or the world around them, and they do not have any interest in this. Any attempts from others to make them tap more into this area in themselves can be extremely painful and mentally draining. The Host is inclined to see people who engage in these areas with interest and proficiency as bewildering, if not somewhat frightening.

Introverted Feeling (Fi)

The Host can possess strong personal likes and dislikes, especially in regards to people, but those preferences and personal morals are typically still tied to standards that are in connection to the moods and values of the majority in the given situation. For instance, a Host might feel inclined to vilify someone whose behavior is hurtful for several people in a given situation, such as a party or other kind of event. In that vein, a Host is more inclined to make statements such as “We don’t like that person“, rather than focusing on their own conviction in the matter. Due to the situational focus, Hosts can “(we-)hate“ someone in one situation and “(we-)like“ them in another. 

Furthermore, the Host is well-able to pick up on emotional nuances that can be more hidden, and how to navigate and see personal sympathies between people. But these insights are only in service to the general well-being of people, rarely for their own perspective.

Introverted Thinking Valuing (Ti)

In contrast to their focus on people, the Host strongly appreciates someone “making sense“ of various phenomena from a purely logical perspective, if necessary even by including logical generalizations that are easy to understand and combine seemingly separate elements to a unified picture. Different from the Inspirer, who prefers logical explanations of systems and structures that can be tangibly implemented in the world, the Host is more fascinated by logical understanding in regards to ideas that are far-reaching and mostly make sense of the world in a broader sense, without any specific call to action, such as understanding how the universe works. Typically, people like the Experimentalist and Theorist can provide such insights.


Host Celebrities: Click here

Note: Of course there are hosts who possess a different personality type, so please do not assume that all hosts in the world fit this personality type! I call the Extroverted Feeling + Sensing personality type “The Host” not only because they are usually hosting, but also because this personality structure personifies the archetype the best.


Type Compatibility

Most compatible:

Least compatible: The Futurist

*Note: These types can be occasionally less compatible due to mismatching Enneagram Trifixes.


Functions

The Ego of the Host

  1. Extroverted Feeling (Fe)
  2. Introverted Sensing (Si)

The Super-Id (valued but weak)

The weakest Functions:

The strongest Functions:

Correlations:

ESFJ (MBTI), ESE (Socionics)

Note: Both MBTI and Socionics include Big 5-related aspects in their types, especially MBTI is mostly a variation of Big 5 nowadays. My version of the Jungian types does not use Big 5 traits, hence the conventional 4-letter idea of “ESFJ” might not fully apply. Based on the letters, you might count as “ESFJ” but not as The Host with Fe and Si as their first functions. Read this for more on this issue.


Subtypes

There are 3 specific subtype variations of the Host.

Those variations can be grouped into Fe (Extroverted Feeling) subtype and Ni (Introverted Intuition) subtype.

Fe Subtype (Classic Extrovert)

Fe subtype Hosts share most of those traits:

  • Stereotypically extroverted
  • Less athletic, can be inclined to inactivity
  • Highly emotionally expressive (lots of facial animation)
  • More ingenious and quick-witted

Can be mistaken for ENFJ / EIE.

Si Subtype (Introverted Extrovert / “Ambiverted”)

Si subtype Hosts share most of those traits:

  • ”Ambiverted” (can be mistaken for an introvert)
  • More focused on health, physical well-being
  • Can be quite pushy and managerial, if needed
  • Often more involved in technical or physical careers and pastimes

Can be mistaken for ISFJ, ISTJ, ESTJ / SEI, SLI, LSE.

Note: Don’t mistake Jungian “ambiversion” with asociable Enneagram instinctual stackings, like Sx/Sp and Sp/Sx. If you are an extrovert with one of those stackings, you’ll come across as “ambiverted”, even if you don’t have that subtype!

No Subtype (Standard Type)

A Host who falls into both categories more or less is mostly likely the No subtype kind.


Enneagram Types

If you are not a Type 2, then you are most likely not The Host. But make sure you are correctly typed. You can book a Get•Typed session here.


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